Our Night

What's wrong, are you looking at the bug?

Yeah, what is it?

I'm pretty sure it's a potato bug.  Want me to kill it?

No, not if it's a roly poly!

Pretty sure it is babe.  Yeah, it is.  Think it's lost?  He ain't gonna find any food up the wall.  If he keeps going he's just going to reach the ceiling.  Maybe fall.  Do we try to move him?

I don't know.  Yes?  No.  Yes?

Oh, he's second guessing.  No, still going up.

He's just following the cracks.  Dude's going for it.

He's climbing Everest.  Maybe he isn't lost. 

We're seriously sitting here talking about a potato bug.

Yeah, I'm treating it like he can tell the fucking difference between going that way, or the other.  Fuck it, maybe he knows what he's doing.  Or, maybe it's just the personification of a bug.

Pretty sure he doesn't know what he is doing.

Someone could say the same about us.  I mean, don't you believe in free will?

Oh, oh, he's going sideways -

- uh babe, he's gonna fall.

Na, I think he's got it.  There he goes, he's heading toward the window now.  He's like fuck that noise, going for this.  Here, wait.

What are you putting on?  Well now it's scared.

Epic shit.

He won't make it to Everest.

He's having second thoughts, he's going down.  He can't decide. Are you recording this shit!

Yup!  I fucking love this song in the background.  He's going for it!

Maybe he feels it's more advantageous if he goes up the window.  Come on buddy, you got this.  Come on buddy, you got this shit.  Make it to the window sill.

Oh, he found the groove now.

If you make it up you're the illest potato bug of them all.  Yeah, he found the track.

...

.....

.........

At this point, we realized this potato bug is really just lost as fuck.  Doesn't know where to go!

Can I stop recording now?

He's going back and forth, doesn't know where the fuck to go.

Can I stop recording now?

All of this has no meaning.

He's going to get inside the house, my house isn't sealed well he's going to get in!

Na, it looks sealed.  No, watch he'll go up in that crack but it looks like it's sealed so he will just keep going along the window.

Mmmhmm...bubs, he's going in.

No, watch.

...

Ahh fuck.

Well go stop him!  I don't need anymore bugs inside!

I'll try n' scoop him up. 

Shit.

Shit! Where'd he go!

He fell, don't move.  Might be in the planter - can't see, grabbing my phone.

I don't see him bubs.

He has to of fallen in one of these pots...I don't see him though.

...Can't find him...

I dunno babe. 

It's alright bubs.  I love that we just spent thirty to forty minutes on a fucking potato bug.  Poor Chester.

His name is Chester?

Yes!  I like that name for him.  It's cute.  Chester the Molester, he's creepin' on walls.

Love you babe.

Love you bubs.

Another drink?

Another drink.

Oh shit, there he is!  Chester!

Awwww, Chester!

Alright, getting him back to the dirt where he belongs.  Chester's a bad mother fucker.

You know, fuck that.  His name isn't Chester, it's Magmar.

Magmar?  Why?

Cuz he's a badass.

So...like, the Pokémon.  Magmar.  That signifies badass?

Yes.

Love you babe.

Love you bubs.

Magmar's Night

"Shit, fuck, lost, shit.  Fuck.  Shit.  AHHHH.  Shit.  Shiiiiiiiiiiiiit.  Ok.  Left.  Leeeeft....left left left left, SHIT.  AHHHHHHHH.  Window...FUCK.  Wait, Chester?  AHHHH SHIIIIIIIT.  Ok, dirt.  Happy...bird?!?  SHIIIIIT.